14 Ridiculous Things We Need To Stop Saying To People Who Have Been Abused

Abuse is not limited to rape; neither to adult women. Children, people who identify as male, females, both, or none genders get abused as well. You have been abused if someone catcalls you, you have been abused if someone bullies you, you have been abused if someone humiliates you and you have been abused if someone tells you that it is normal to be abused because everyone is going through it. Here are a few things that everyone who has been abused have been told:


#1. “Are you sure that the slap hurt?”




#2. “You’re not the only one, so don’t talk so much about it.”




#3. “You need to stop victimizing yourself.”



#4. “How do I know if what you’re saying is true?



#5. “You’re a tall, well built guy, there is no way anyone could’ve harassed you.”



#6. “It’s only natural that she wanted to have sex with you, you guys have been dating for a long time now!”



#7. “Honey, if a boy hits you, he likes you.”



#8. “Your coach only wants you to excel at the game, and if public humiliation is going to get results, it should be done.”

One Tree Hill "The Placees You Have Come To Fear The Most" (Prod #177501) Roll 4, Frame 0A-1 Pictured (left to right): Paul Johansson as Dan, James Lafferty as Nathan Photo Credit: © The WB/Fred Norris



#9. “It happened to me too, and I didn’t make a big deal about it, nor should you.”



#10. “You never look like you’ve been abused as a child.”



#11. “But your aunt would never do that to you, all your happy memories are associated with her, you used to love spending time with her!”



#12. “You’re lying because you want attention.”



#13. “No one asks for consent to kiss someone, don’t go around expecting that, or you will feel abused.”



#14. “We don’t need you to feel sorry for yourself all the time, you need to move on.”




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This story is written by .

Kanchi Vasavada

Kanchi is a features editor at Youth Connect. A tech enthusiast and a reader, she, like Dumbledore thinks that words are the most inexhaustible source of magic we have.


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